Thursday, July 29, 2010

By special request....

Okay, first the good news: I am down!!!! I didn't look at the exact decimal figure but it's over 2.0 -- WHEW!!!!

Monday night, I was given the privilege of sharing my story with another meeting. I truly mean it when I say that I love being able to tell people that all things are possible. I enjoy sharing my ups and downs, and reminding others - and myself - that persistence pays, determination delivers, and that it isn't failure, it's feedback. I know that sounds like a trite phrase but it is TRUE. "So what did you learn from this?" is a question that needs constant answering.

On Monday night, I shared a Chicken BBQ recipe with the group. My leader told tonight's group about it, and I have been asked to post it here --- GLADLY!! I love BBQ, no doubt. Had WW ever said, "Give up the pig" I would have been gone! But a local chain does chopped/pulled chicken as well -- very handy years ago when I was having gallstone issues!! And I love good mustard-based sauce, as only we in SC can do! This one is easy to make, and calorie/POINT-friendly!

NETTIEMAC'S CHICKEN BBQ REDONE

2 pounds boneless, skinless chicken breast (either breast halves or tenderloins)
1 12-oz jar (~1.5 c) Dijon mustard (I used a squeeze bottle)
1 12-oz jar (~1.5 c) sugar-free apricot or peach preserves (I used Smucker's)

In a slow cooker (min. 3 quart), spray crock lightly with cooking spray or use a liner. Place chicken in crock (lined or sprayed), then mustard, then preserves. Stir well enough to coat the chicken and mix the mustard & preserves. Cook on low for 8-10 hours or until sauce is to desired consistency (could take another hour if you like it drier). IF POSSIBLE, shred the chicken maybe once or twice during the cooking time. If not, no biggie -- it will still fall apart just fine.

Makes around 5-1/2 cups. Points values:
1/4 c serving = 1 pt
1/3 c serving = 2 pts
1/2 c serving = 3 pts

From this batch, I put 4 cups in the freezer, and have been eating off the remainder. I had a good bit of sauce this time..... that's moppin' sauce, so be sure you have some bread with you for that. MMM-MMM!

Thursday, July 22, 2010

One step forward, two steps back

.... is not just a song by Bruce Springsteen.

Up this week. But I understood why. It's been a slightly off-kilter week. I've carbed way more than usual this week, and haven't watched my sodium as much. This one is on me. So guess what? So is the solution.

Part of that solution was meeting with Dave The Trainer tonight and getting a new workout. The current workout is still working, but it was time to shake it up and do something new. There is something to be said for the concept of muscle confusion! Tonight's was Upper Body Giant Sets.... two smaller Supersets .... one for chest/upper back; one for upper shoulders/biceps/triceps. Right now, my arms are a little sore..... heh. I asked Dave if I was going to be able to grip a steering wheel tomorrow; he laughed and said, "Yep! You'll be sore tonight and fine tomorrow." We shall see. Then next week, we'll work on Lower Body/Core. Tonight's core exercises were .... a little less successful. But with practice, I might get pretty good at them.

I will keep working on finding the good things I do. I want so much not to stress the numbers, but it's only natural for me to focus on that. And I want to keep finding answers for the medical things. I've had other things going on so I haven't spent much time on it.... but the time has come. I sat in my office freezing today, while my coworkers were either warm or comfortable. I had on a cardigan, and a wrap over my legs. I went outside in the 90+ heat/humidity to warm up. THAT IS NOT NORMAL.

As I told Dave, there is something going on with my body. I cannot prove it, but I know my hunches. And I trust them. It might not be thyroid, but I do believe it is endocrine-related. Might it be something with the hypothalamus? Could it be insulin resistance? Maybe it's adrenal? Is it simply early onset (peri)menopause? I don't know. But I need some help in finding the answers. So tomorrow, I am calling one of the internal medicine people near work and trying to book an appointment as soon as I can. I need to know. If it turns out my hunch is wrong, GREAT! If not, BETTER!

And I'm still working on Mama and her situation. You've seen the images either in print or on video of Rocky Mountain rams with the curly horns that constantly butt heads.... uh, yeah. They have NOTHING on me and my mother! But for both of us, we're going to get answers.

Friday, July 16, 2010

FINALLY!

It's been a while but the scale moved significantly in a lower direction. W.H.E.W.

As it turns out, this week's topic was all about NSV's - non-scale victories. I've been living off NSV's for a while now. They are important, more important than we realize! The funny thing is, several times this week, I've had people asking me, "How much more have you lost?" When I tell them I've actually put a little back on, they're like, "But you look so thinner!" To which I say: THANK YOU DAVE!!!! Dave is the personal trainer who is working with me, his workout is killer ... and it works!

My leader has encouraged us to write in our trackers, or on e-Tools, or somehow to actually write each day, at least ONE good choice we made that day..... So for Thursday, mine was being satisfied with my lunch -- enough so that I completely forgot about the WW Giant Latte bar that I'd had on my mind not even 30 minutes earlier. I had told myself that I would have one for dessert when I got to the office (I have a few in the freezer there). It was 3:00 before I thought about it again, and I realized then that I really didn't want it. I waited until I got home that night to have some instead.

Heck, I'll even go ahead and list mine for today: working out anyway. The last couple of Fridays, I have gone home first and then gone on Saturday to work out .... so I'm not skipping, just rearranging the days. I thought about doing the same thing today. I even got in the RR at the gym to change clothes and thought, "Why don't I just go home and rest?" But it wasn't crowded, and I knew I could get through my routine in a decent pace, and ..... well, I was there and halfway dressed out already. And I'm so glad I chose to stay and work out. I always feel better afterwards, and then I think, "Why did I not want to work out tonight?" (or ever, for that matter). It's a feeling of achievement and accomplishment that I love.

So think of all you've achieved, every good choice you make. It's hard -- I mean, y'all have seen how the last few weeks have been for me. Focusing on all I've accomplished and thinking of where I was 5 years ago took a backseat to about 6 months out of my life. So I'm really taking this challenge to heart this week. I hope you do too!

***

IN GOOD NEWS.......... JINNY!!!!! You did it!!! I am so proud of you! I'm so proud of your hard work, your dedication to yourself, and all the progress you made. Stay with it!

IN LESS-THAN-GOOD NEWS: I just got the word that my best friend's husband is scheduled for another surgery in the morning. He had surgery about 6-8 weeks ago (I can't remember when) but he developed an abcess at the surgical site about 10 days ago. He came home just 2 or 3 days ago, but the antibiotics weren't enough to fully take care of everything. They'll start the surgery at 6:30 AM, and it's going to be a LONG surgery - at least 6 hours. God bless them both! And if you're so inclined, please keep them in your prayers.

Friday, July 09, 2010

Stop the Insanity!

Many years ago, Susan Powter wrote her "diet" book called Stop the Insanity! Somewhere, I think I still have a worn-out copy of it. And out of all the diet/nutrition/fitness books I owned, even though I never followed the plan, hers at least seemed to make sense to me. And I loved the title...

Right now, it feels sometimes that portions of my life are just insane. And I need to stop as much of it as I can..... so last night at the meeting, I made the decision to change my goal weight, by bumping it back up. It was not easy to do this... oh, yeah, filling out the paperwork was, but I was so reluctant. It feels like defeat. It feels like cheating. It feels like my body is telling me, "You wouldn't listen to me, would you? Well, let me show you..."

Which is purely insanity, isn't it?

It's rumored that Albert Einstein said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. So I've changed things up to see if I can tweak the formula: better exercise (to be tweaked again soon), I even added back in some points this week to see if I wasn't eating enough (apparently, not the issue... hmm). I don't have answers, and that's insanity to me.

Not having answers to lots of things is making me crazy. The only thing I could control is my weight goal. Until I get answers as to why this gain is happening. Something is there. I just know. I can't explain intuition, but I just know.

Someone tell me I'm not crazy. Please.

Friday, July 02, 2010

Living the Serenity Prayer

I'm not dropping my basket (to use the phrase from the Ya-Ya book), but I am setting some of the contents down for a while. The stress of the last couple of weeks has finally gotten to me this week, and it showed especially in my weigh-in.

For starters, I am not sleeping well at all..... you know those little "5-Hour Energy" shot drinks? Yeah, I've used a couple of those this week to make it through. On the good side (I suppose), they didn't quite give me the boost that the ads promise, so I doubt I'll be getting any of them again. And a couple of times when I needed to go to bed early to wake earlier than usual, I've used Nytol. Again, not good, and I know this.

The weight gain is giving me grief, and last night as I cried a little from being up YET AGAIN (though only 0.2 pounds), even my leader said, "This is not worth the stress you're putting yourself under; we'll figure out what to do...." So here's my plan:

1. I have to stop worrying myself sick about Mom. I'm of no use to her that way. It doesn't mean I won't continue to get resources, come up with ideas and plans but I can't make her or her doctor do anything. If they can live with their current plan, then what choice do I have? All I can do is be ready for when the time comes. That's it.

2. I will concentrate more on my own health issues. I did that by calling an endocrinology practice. As it turns out, they honestly can't help me because they don't diagnose or test - they just see you once you have. There's another doctor nearby who is an MD and a DO and her practice looks very good. However, she is an out-of-network provider (basically doesn't accept insurance for payment), and her initial consultation is more than I can shell out at once. So I will continue to do research..... (le sigh).

3. I will get more sleep with better quality. Yesterday afternoon, when I sat down at the WW meeting, I didn't realize just how tired I was until I sat still long enough. My schedule has been all out of whack -- the last few weeks, I have staggered my start-end hours at work due to some other commitments. However, it's wreaking havoc in my sleep schedule. It's not healthy. So I spoke to my boss today, and starting next week I will work the same start-end hours every day. It also entails me passing off a responsibility to others, and all the better. I even went to bed early last night (okay, earlier than usual for me) .... it helped some. I only took a 10-minute nap at lunch (instead of 20 or 30)......

4. I will care for myself far better. I'm planning to consider a monthly massage. There are a couple of massage places (reputable ones, that is) near work. I figure if I can, I'll schedule one a month and see how that goes. I definitely plan to get with Stacey (my best friend) more often for mani-pedis! We are also working on a plan for a retreat weekend -- not just the one I am working on with church but a personal private retreat at a nearby convent's guest house. I need the time away from everything to just rejuvenate my spirit. AND I am also planning some time away this weekend as well -- go to the mountains and just take a couple of hours or so and get away from the madding crowd.

I guess I'm calling this "putting the Serenity Prayer into action" - accepting what I can't change, changing what I can, and learning the difference.